The Road Less Travelled by M. Scott Peck: Facing Problems, Love and Spiritual Growth
Solving problems is painful, and many people try to avoid it. But that avoidance, argues the psychiatrist M. Scott Peck, causes even greater suffering and stops us growing, mentally and spiritually.
Author: M. Scott Peck (1936–2005)
Title: The Road Less Travelled (1978)
Format: English paperback (Random House UK), 320 pages
Scope: Psychology and spirituality
Amazon: www.amazon.es/dp/0099727404 (ASIN 0099727404)
Facing Difficulty
As a practising psychiatrist, Dr Peck suggests ways of facing difficulties and suffering through change, so as to reach a higher level of human understanding. Problems, in this view, are not obstacles to a good life but the material from which growth is made.
What Love Is
He discusses the nature of loving relationships and real compatibility, distinguishing between dependency and love, and explains how to become an autonomous person.
"Life Is Difficult"
The book opens with one of the most famous first lines in popular psychology: "Life is difficult." Peck explains that this is a great truth, and that once we truly accept it, life stops being so difficult, because we no longer waste energy complaining that our problems should not exist. Much of human suffering, he argues, comes not from problems themselves but from our attempts to avoid the legitimate pain of facing them, and that avoidance is at the root of much mental illness.
The Tools of Discipline
The first part of the book is about discipline, which Peck sees as the basic set of tools for solving life’s problems. He describes four: delaying gratification, so that pain comes first and pleasure afterwards; accepting responsibility for our own problems instead of blaming others; dedication to reality, which means constantly revising our mental map of the world in the light of new information, however uncomfortable; and balancing, the ability to weigh competing needs and give up old habits and ideas when necessary.
A Definition of Love
In the second part Peck offers his much-quoted definition of love: "the will to extend one’s self for the purpose of nurturing one’s own or another’s spiritual growth." Love, in this view, is not a feeling but an action and a choice. He distinguishes it sharply from the experience of falling in love, which he sees as a temporary collapse of personal boundaries, and from dependency, in which one person relies on another to feel complete. Real love, he writes, requires effort, courage and respect for the other’s separateness.
Growth, Religion and Grace
The later parts of the book move into spiritual territory. Peck treats each person’s world view as a kind of religion that must grow and mature, and he writes about "grace", the unexpected forces that seem to help people grow and heal, from the resilience of patients to fortunate coincidences. Readers of any belief, or none, can follow his reasoning, which is always rooted in his clinical experience.
M. Scott Peck
Morgan Scott Peck (1936–2005) was an American psychiatrist who studied at Harvard and served as a doctor in the US Army before going into private practice in Connecticut. The Road Less Travelled, published in 1978, sold slowly at first, then spread by word of mouth until it became one of the longest-running bestsellers of its time. He later wrote People of the Lie, about human evil, and several other books.
The Title
The title echoes Robert Frost’s poem "The Road Not Taken", with its traveller who chooses the less-travelled path, and that, Peck suggests, is what personal growth demands: the harder road of discipline and honesty, rather than the easy one of avoidance.
Why Read It
Short chapters, a warm tone and a psychiatrist’s experience make it one of the most widely read books of its kind. It suits readers going through a difficult period who want understanding rather than quick fixes.
As an Amazon Associate, this site earns from qualifying purchases.
Part of the reading recommendations featured on books.sapiensverbum.com.
